Happiness can be simple

Last week I was reminded that happiness can be simple. It doesn't have to be expensive it doesn't even have to cost anything at all. It can be found in just a moment of zen. A moment when you forget that you have papers due and you haven't been out for a walk yet this week. The house is a mess and you still need to go back to work for the day. Happiness can be found in the moment a little person insists upon their right to cuddle in your arms. That for now nothing is more important than being mom.

Does it solve all the problems? I wish it could. I would just crawl back into bed and take the toddler with me. We would curl up and watch Sesame Street and that would be enough at least until we got hungry or I had to pee. Instead I still have papers to write this week, mid terms to take, work, laundry and a lot of other things to do but we are going to make sure we take our time.

Time for a cuddle. Time for a walk. Time for comics, a coffee and cookie date. You know the important things that don't sound important but make for the happy. I need more happy and it's right in front of me.

Sunday Confessions: Reconcile

Reconcile: to cause to submit to or accept something unpleasant.

I have reached the point where I have reconciled with the fact I don't fit in with my sister in laws and brother in laws. Does it bother me, yes. Do I wish it was otherwise, yes. Am I going to wallow in self pity that we aren't friends and I don't think they like me very much, no. I am moving on.

Growing up I had the big family where everyone got together for holidays, weekends, and for no reason that we hadn't seen each other in a while. My in laws do a biweekly dinner that I often miss do to my work schedule. Even so I have never felt the same casual comfort with my sister in law and sister in law to be. I have tried to wave the olive branch by offering facebook friendship,  coffee, and referrals for pampering parties. That has been meet with limited success. Does it make me sad yes, but again I am no longer dwelling. My son may never know the joy of hanging out with cousins for the sake of why not, or we just got a new dvd lets make it a party but we do have other wonderful people in our lives.

People who are available when I need someone to have a have a cup of coffee with. Or watch the Miniman for a few hours. Or show up when I get talked into hosting a pampering party. Attend my wedding (well let's not do that again). You get the idea I may not of gained sisters with marriage but I have gained "sisters" through work, "sisters" through the internet," sisters" though Oregon. I love you ladies and I am so reconciled to your being the family I get to choose.

My son watches princess movies

 

and guess what it's ok. The girls have also watched their fair share of boyish movies but that's not the point. The point is that its ok that he is enjoying movies with songs, dance, and learning classic stories. Are the tales the same as the Brother's Grimms?, no they are a cleaner, edited, more pc and cuddly version. He is learning other lessons too like to be brave, to not talk to strangers, to ask for help, to be adventurous, to stand up for others, that sometimes bad things happen, plus so much more. Not to mention that a cool animal sidekick or some talking dishware can take you a long way. (Now if someone can find me a happy little bluebird to do the dishes? Maybe call Disney?)

 

You might say but he's a BOY, its ok he is also 13 months. I promise I am not traumatizing him. Right now its about soothing soundtrack, bright colors, and a story line that mommy hasn't a million times since his sister's out grew the dvds. I am refusing to have him grow up and say I can't watch this, its for girls. Movies are for all ages and genders to enjoy.  (Also before someone runs out screaming about screen time, he really maybe watches a 90 minute dvd once a week. Give or take the nap he usually takes part of the way through.)

 

 

Now if anyone needs me, we need to check the mail to see if Mulan has arrived yet.

Being a student is hard and death sucks

This has been my first week back to school as an adult. It was also the week we lost my last grandpa and Mini's great grandpa. There was a lot of stress and decisions to be made. Let's never do a week like this again. It's hard to say I don't have the ability to go be a functional family member right now. Not just because of financial reasons, but because I have to prioritize being a good mother, employee and student. Would I loved to have been able to go and pay my respects, yes. Would it have caused other things to spin out of control yes.

Grieving is hard as a parent especially when you don't really have an outlet. Skipping the funeral and having a child to young to understand death made things interesting. Day to day operations at Casa Moe had to continue. I also needed to still go to my classes, submit my homework. There were hours to be worked at the money job too. Things had to continue and yet there is a loss.

I'm not ready to move on just yet and delete the last text messages from my phone. In time yes and probably before my next upgrade. Just not now. I need time to process. There are quite a few times that I take a picture or a video clip and get ready to send it and I'm not able to.

*** I started this post 9 days ago and I am going to publish it as it is now. I need to go back to posting weekly. So that is something I will have to factor into my weekly agenda. Right now I have read all the chapters I need to for the week and maybe I have had to much coffee. Thank you for putting up with my erratic posting schedule right. It should get better soon****

Sometimes you just need to feel like a Bad Bitch

***Disclaimer*** This was indeed a sponsored post, however the thoughts and opinions are my own. Secondly if I didn't like and believe in the product I wouldn't of jumped on the band wagon to help promote her.

These two beauties are Cupid's Kiss and Cupid's Arrow from Bad Bitch Polish's line of Valentine's Day polishes. First off the colors are amazing I wasn't sure at first about the solid pink aka Cupid's Arrow my nails are generally something pretty non girly and sexy. However this pink is bright, vivid and fun. It also made me want to slip on a pair of peep toed stilettos and saunter through the house reveling in my prettiness. Than with an  top coat of Cupid's kiss they popped. I have to apologize my Mini man was dancing on my toes so there are some smudges that are unrelated to the product.

Also while I was painting my toes the Mini man was quite upset that he didn't get to be in touch with his inner Bad Bitch.  So he is modeling Cupid's Arrow for you. Before you freak out about my painting his little nails and let me add the reason I felt safe and comfortable is this polish is 3 free, cruelty free, vegan, it's also hand mixed and made in the United States. I felt very confident in the safety of this product even on my youngest. Plus it made him happy.

I was also sent the most amazing orange color called Orange Fizz. I didn't get a fabulous photo when it was on my toes so I am borrowing her store image for it. This orange is also not a normal color for me but it is amazing like a trip to the soda fountain for your nails. It's bright, its glittery, and you just feel fun and confident wearing it. I can not praise this product enough.

See that's what beautiful professional nails look like when done in Bad Bitch Polish sleek and sexy. Another highlight of the brand is tucked in with your order is a little instruction sheet of how to get similar results on your own. I have never before in my life had someone tell me how to put on nail polish but the truth is her directions work (until you have a toddler dance on your toes). It's also a great way to treat yourself affordably with these products. At only $8.00 a bottle you are getting something of quality that is HAND made. That to me means with love and with care.

So the important details. Where can you find the wonderful joy for yourself? By simply visiting:
www.badbitchpolish.com you can also follow on Facebook at www.facebook.com/bbpolish.

   

New Year, new me? Nah I don't think so.

I have to admit while I like the idea of the New Year's resolution I also like watching people fail at them. I know it's kind of awful but I can't help it. While I would love to say this year I am going to lose 50lbs, join a gym, read the complete works of Shakespeare, actually use one of those word a day calendars, learn a new language, and etc. The truth is my resolution for this year is to just keep doing what I am doing. If I manage to cross off things from my actual to do list you'll hear about them but there will be no loud proclamation of I shall, I can. No I am keeping quiet until I can say I did.

There are many things I would love to say I am doing but the truth is. I do a lot. Being a mom is a full time commitment, so is being a wife, an employee, and a student. A lot of the time it doesn't leave a whole lot of time for me to be me. A good week can include my taking the extra 5-10 minutes in the shower to destubble the legs and if its a very decadent week use a face mask, foot treatment, or body scrub. A great week means I made it out of yoga pants and put on make up for something other than the days of work that I actually interact with people. Again this doesn't always happen. Sometimes I do pad into work in a tshirt, yoga pants, and flip flops. I'm not real proud but the truth is the odds of that changing this year are no greater than it changing in years past.

I refuse to set myself up for failure anymore. What happens is what happens. If I loose another pants size this year great (someone had better take me shopping than because this online method isn't always so flattering, if I manage to read a classic go me if I don't still go me because I read something other than a text book. If the house stays reasonably clean and a homemade dinner makes it on the table over 75% of the time well than I am just a domestic goddess and offerings should be left. I am not resolving to make any changes but I am resolving to love me. To be kind to myself. No New Year new me. New Year same me I am good enough, you are too. Let's make 2014 our year people!